Friday 15 May 2009

The Final Whitle-Blissett Gw Edition 15.6.2009



The Dagger Blog. Blissett Gameworld Edition 15/06/2009

Is this week proudly sponsored by Ally Dale (pure inspiration)Fragrance for Men?

In this week’s handy email sized Edition..

Life in the Prem...1st Team coach Swiss Toni and his first week`s report from the AEFA Prem
The Diccon Brown Column...Diccons guide to training methods
TV favourites....can you watch TV and play FML at the same time?
The Real World...Our usual dip into the freebies and online Forums..
The Toni Report...A Swiss eyed view at the Gameworld and what the state of play is

Life in the Prem

We managed to grab a minute with Daggers Utd first team coach Swiss Toni...”The first game of the season we suffered out first defeat and to be honest more than expected to the Morose Maruaders..but with a respectable 3-2 scorline..things didn’t look so bad..perticular pleasure came in the next 4 games...2 draws to Ben Hibberts Dynamos and a 2 wins against the much fancied Norfolk N Chance gave the daggers dressing room a glimmer of hope for the rest of the season...However with 2 defeats against Korsten and Buckfast the reality of premiership life had hit us.perticularly the next 4 games produced no wins although 2 draws against the Grizzlies and Pumas..the spirit was lifted....Next came BHA..Rikki Hawkins had rememeber which team to log in under and 2 defeats were again registered on the league table for the daggers, with a further Defeat against Puma`s it looks like its going to be a hard struggle from here on in. The youth side were fairing well with a couple of top class loans in from the Dublin Hearts we were doing well..amusingly because of an administrative cock up with the AEFA organisation the Daggers Board have decide to cash in on the youth wages and just Loan em in for the rest of the campaign!! Its like a branch of blockbusters in the dressing room when the youth have a game! I keep having to scan people membership cards and give them free bottles of coke and bags of revels!

The Diccon Brown Column
This weeks training Methods..

I gave the boys a week off for some team building exercises
Keepers went paintballing... or rather were tied up as the practice target dummies to help them get used to stopping shots. The defence were taken to see how castrato singers get their dulcet tones... they're now a lot more concerned about their tackles. Strikers had a stint as deep sea trawler men to help them find the net. Wingers took a week in intensive labour camps to help them learn about an end product. And the midfield were enlisted and sent to a war zone... one way or another I'll have midfield generals.

They're all now VERY keen to get back to training as normal

TV favourites....can you watch TV and play FML at the same time?

It occurred to me today that i sit playing FML in front of me and the TV is always on...so what is your top ten background TV programmes...i say background cos u don’t really watch them properly do you?
In no Particular order heres what normally on for me...

Top Gear on Dave or Dave Ja Vu...that’s witty isn’t it..genius
Mock the Week on Dave
Dragons Den on Dave
MOTD on BBC
MOTD on BBC 2
Casualty on BBC (the Mrs. has control here)
CSI on LIVING +1+2 or Channel 5
Only fools and Horses on Gold or +1
The Vicar of Dibley on Gold or +1
MASH on Comedy Central

Couldn’t think of a 10th...so its down to the flick through of all channels on the virgin box..stopping at Sons of Arnorchy, Have i Got news for you, Buzzcocks, The A-Team..and if im really desperate for some background TV sounds..setanta or skysports news, CNN or BBC news..

Or heres an IDEA...just turn the bloody thing off Cos your not REALLY watching it are you?? I’m sure I should really be out with the lads, down the pub, but hang on I’ve done all that for the last 20 years and besides i can always chat to them on MSN or they text me endless jokes about swine flu.. so now its come to this...with my 19th month old daughter safely tucked up in her sleepsuit kicking nine bells out of the bars on the COT..i can finnaly have some piece and quite..AHHHH. well almost cos the TV is on don’t forget!

The Real World
This week we look around the Forums and the bits of the freebies that are actually quite funny and topical!
When FML has taken over and that I can’t bring myself to play FM09 anymore..

Always been a complete addict to FM games, but FML just blows it to bits, every minute I was playing FM09 I felt like I was wasting good time that could be spent on FML. For a while I was playing both at the same time, but that just made me feel like I wasn’t paying enough attention to FML!!!!

Football manager is like your long term girlfriend that you were comfortable with and FML is like her bigger chested, smutty supermodel sister in law who started popping round to take you dogging when your long term girlfriend was at the gym etc

Although for comfort and nostalgia reasons you still hang out with your old girl friend every now and then but its not the same, the supermodel has you 100% under her thumb!

Thanks SI, you managed to quench one obsession whilst getting me hooked on something even more addictive!

INTERSTING...A New FA on the horizon?
The White Van Man FA (TWVM)

Monday to Thursday 6pm-10pm as he works 9-5

Friday no times as he’s off down the pub with his mates

Saturday 9am-12pm- bit of FML before he sets off to the pub before the match

Sunday 12pm-10pm what better way is there to spend a Sunday other then FML while watching footy on the box?


Our Top 5 this week comes from the Free London Paper...not the dodgy Lite one tho!
THINGS YOU DONT WANT TO HEAR FROM A FOOTBALLER

5” Of course i`ll sign your autograph, Junior. In exchange for your hot, Slutty looking mum`s phone number!
4.”Failed the breathalyser? HA! Well, thank god this isn’t a drugs test!
3.”Wait till they find out we`ve been claiming expenses!
2.The fans, the chairman, this clubs proud history. These are 3 things i ignored most when signing. I came for the cash!
1.”im on thousands a week.I don’t Train. I miss every other game. Tell me, why do the public not like us?

With Man Utd 1 point from the Title,Sir Alex has warned against complacentcy. HE began an impromptu conga, popped open a bottle of champagne, clapped his hands and chanted “easy,easy,easy”

Paul Gascoigne will be appearing on the next series of im a celebrity get me out of here. He`ll have to live rough,sleep outdoors and eat insects. It`ll be just like 2008 for him!

Harry Redknapp has banned booze at spurs after Ledley King staggered out of a nightclub.” You shouldn’t put diesel in a Ferrari, or in Kings case an Austin Allegro with a wonky tyre. "You've only got to go abroad in the summer to certain parts of the world, you see drunken kids laying around, acting like maniacs, causing problems and it's a problem we've had in this country for years now," added Redknapp.
King Himself took 2 steps forward and 8 steps back, 3 forward, eight back and six forward. Its not clear wether he was drunk, or trying to interpret Spurs recent history through the medium of dance

And finally this week Chelsea`s Ashley cole is sick on a hairdresser, Ledley King staggers from a nightclub and ends up weating his pants in a police cell , Arsenal Nicklas bendtner is caught with his jeans round his knees. The Pressure must be mounting on Fulham and West Ham to do something TRULY remarkable!

The Toni Report (sponsored by www.blissett.org)
Another week is over in FML and its business as usual really, the rantings from newbie’s about not having there cups started and that no bugger is on to play..there’s 450 million managers on in Shearer gw..well i know what would do then pal!! Only kidding...just take it easy! Join the fun in the lobby...tune in at 12:11 for a usual insite into everyone’s finances..oh look at me ive got a massive daily profit and your all shit!! Well thanks that`ll make me sleep easy now you sad people! Why do we play this game? Because we are all aspiring Football managers? Is it in the bloody that most Male Uk inhabaties just have to have some kind of football shoot up every day? Well it beat`s crack cocaine any day...apparently...and then theres the managers that comes on now and again just to check if his/her`s bank account has been boosted enough to be bothered to play at all, ah don’t worry i`ll be back in a couple of seasons by which time i`ll have 5-6 million in the bank and you can all sod off cos im going to be be the best...or there’s the manager who just hates the game! Did we force you to sign in tonight? No...its the drugs!! Get me to rehab!!

That’s it..have a good second week of Season 5 and rememeber...think of the environment...do you really need the TV on?
Kev Flack (Swiss Chat helper Toni)

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